


It Feels So Good

by yokainomiko



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Chrome is out of character everyone else is probably fine, Gay Bar, Gen, Humor, M/M, Out of Character, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-01
Updated: 2012-01-01
Packaged: 2017-11-12 04:27:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/486678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yokainomiko/pseuds/yokainomiko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tsuna goes to a gay bar with his guardians.  It goes about as well as expected.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It Feels So Good

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [Written-KHR](http://written-khr.tumblr.com/). [Request](http://pics.livejournal.com/yokainomiko/pic/00044gak)

Title: It Feels So Good  
Series: Katekyo Hitman Reborn (KHR)  
Pairing/Character(s): Tsuna + his guardians  
Genre: Humor/Romance  
Rating: PG-13/T  
Word Count: 1687  


\-------------------------------------  


Tsuna groaned. “Why are we here?” He asked almost moaning in frustration.

Gokudera growled, “That stupid cow sent us an S.O.S. saying that something was horribly wrong and that he was in danger and then gave us an address and hung up.”

Yamamoto laughed. “Haha, yeah! And then you freaked out and got all of your guardians together to go rescue him. And now here we are!”

“But where _are_ we?” Tsuna asked. “What is this place?!”

Mukuro sighed. “Vongola. It’s called a gay bar. Have a little decorum.”

Hibari promptly left to go show off his moves on the dance floor. And by show off his dance moves, he meant biting people to death for violating safety regulations by going over the maximum capacity for the building.

Tsuna wisely decided that it wasn’t worth arguing about and dragged Gokudera towards a restroom sign that he was pretty sure would lead him to a hiding Lambo. Yamamoto waved good-bye as Tsuna grumbled, “How the hell did he even get in in the first place? He’s fifteen for Christ’s sake…”

Ryohei threw his fists in the air. “This is very extreme! We need to celebrate with an extreme drink! C’mon Yamamoto let’s go!”

“Haha sure, Senpai. Your treat, right?”

The two passed a couple groping each other and Ryohei paused to give them an extreme thumbs up.

“Hey Sweetness.”

Mukuro froze. He took a quick glance at the ordinary looking blond man with a strangely creepy smile and promptly created an illusion worthy of his talents.

“Yes?” he asked. “Can I help you with something?” He smiled brightly.

The man did a double take. “Oh, you’re a woman.”

“Kufufu, yes, yes I am.” Mukuro continued to smile. It was rather creepy considering the fact that he was disguising himself as basically the female version of Hibari. “Is that a problem?”

“Oh, uh, well, I’m really… I mean, I kind of expected…”

“Oh!” Mukuro clapped his hands together as a truly enjoyable way of passing the time occurred to him. “I’m not your type am I? Don’t worry! I know someone perfect for you!”

“Uh, well, really?” It was kind of funny how nervous the guy was.

“Kufufu. Yup! My big brother!” Mukuro smirked momentarily at how excited the man got at the mention of a brother. He pointed to the dance floor. “Hibari Kyoya! He has this huge thing for blonds and his beau of the last couple years has been kind of neglecting him lately…”

The creepy smile was back. “Oh really? Well, maybe he just needs a new blond in his life. What’s he look like?”

“He looks like me! But he’s a boy.” Mukuro giggled. “I mean, obviously. He’s my big _brother_ , right?”

The strange man started panting in excitement and practically fell over himself as he raced towards the throng of people that was getting slowly but surely annihilated by Hibari. Mukuro patted himself on the back for a job well done and promptly changed his illusion to an ordinary looking young woman to avoid attention.

“It was a traaaappppp!” Lambo sobbed.

Tsuna comforted Lambo the best he could while fishing his mittens out of his pockets. “What kind of a trap?! Are you hurt? Do you think we’ll need back up?” he frantically asked.

Gokudera paled. “Uh, Tenth…”

Lambo ignored Tsuna and Gokudera both. “How was I supposed to know she was a trap? It’s not my fault, right?”

“Shh, shh. It’s okay Lambo,” Tsuna said in his most comforting voice. “No one’s upset with you. It’s okay. You’re not hurt so it’s fine. No worries.”

“Tenth, I’m pretty sure what he’s talking about isn’t the same as what you’re thinking.”

Tsuna managed to slip his gloves on. “Ah ha!” He looked at Gokudera. “What do you mean?”

Lambo’s quieting sobs escalated into one final eardrum-shattering finale. “SHE WAS A MAAAAANNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!” he yelled.

“WHAT?!?!” Tsuna shrieked.

Gokudera coughed into his hand. “You know, Tenth, when men get mistaken for women? They’re called traps.”

“M-m-mistaken for women?” Tsuna stuttered. “You mean, that really happens? And It’s not something to be ashamed of?”

“Tenth! It’s not shameful at all to mistake a very feminine man for a woman. Some of them are very convincing!” Gokudera emphatically replied. “Don’t worry! It doesn’t make you any less of a man.”

“But how many does it make you if you’re the one people think are a woman?” Tsuna mumbled. He sighed. “Whatever. Gokudera-kun, we need to get Lambo out of here anyway. He’s obviously traumatized and I’m getting close to my breaking point too.”

Since Tsuna was about the same height as Lambo, they pushed him onto Gokudera’s back and left the men’s room.

Tsuna blushed furiously when people whistled after them and decided that he really really wanted the day to just be over already.

They got back to the main entrance, but there weren’t any guardians around.

“Uh, Gokudera-kun? Where is everyone?”

“EXTREME DRINKING!” Ryohei yelled.

“Haha, Senpai? I think you’ve had enough.” Yamamoto said.

“Nonsense Yamamoto! I can still feel my toes!” Ryohei replied.

Yamamoto’s ever present smile seemed kind of strained. “Well, um, can you still feel your stomach?” he asked. “If you can’t that would be a good sign to stop, right?” Yamamoto was trying to think with drunk-Ryohei logic, but it wasn’t going very well.

“An extremely good idea!” Ryohei yelled. He then tore off his shirt. “Does anyone want to touch my stomach so I can figure out if I should stop drinking?” he asked the bar.

A crowd of hands immediately went up. Ryohei blinked. “Am I seeing doubles or are there a lot of hands?”

Yamamoto sighed. “There are a lot of hands.”

“Oh.” Ryohei poked his forehead while thinking. “I know! I have an extreme challenge! Before you can touch me you have to touch each other! That way I’ll have the best person touch me!”

The guys, drooling at Ryohei’s muscles that moved in time with his arms immediately tore off their shirts and started rubbing each other. It quickly degenerated into a gropefest where many different parts of their anatomy connected with other parts.

Ryohei was forgotten.

“This is extremely boring.” He said.

“Maybe this is a sign to stop drinking?” Yamamoto asked.

Ryohei looked as his empty drink. “Barkeep! One more drink!” He grabbed it with one hand and Yamamoto with the other and decided to search for something more interesting to do.

For once in his life, Yamamoto wished that he was more like Gokudera.

Hibari briskly walked away from the dance floor. “Get away from me,” he hissed.

The blond guy from earlier continued to follow him. “Aw, don’t be like that Sweet Cheeks. I heard from your sister that you’re in a bad romance. You just need someone new in your life.”

“I. am. an. only. child.” He slowly replied.

The guy laughed. “Dude, she looks exactly like you. Only you know…” he paused to leer at Hibari’s crotch. “…missing a few attributes.”

Hibari pulled out Alaude’s handcuffs. “I am going to bite you to death.”

“Oooh kinky. Do you want to do it here or somewhere in private?”

Hibari started to sweat. This guy was not getting a clue. “I’m seeing someone?” he finally asked.

“Are you?” the guy gave his “sexiest” grin to him. “If it has to be a question, I’m guessing you’re pretty free.”

“I’m seeing him,” Hibari replied, grabbing the first person he saw who would easily be intimidated into going with the flow.

This person happened to be Tsuna.

“What?!” Gokudera asked in outrage.

Hibari hissed. “Go with the flow you stupid herbivores.”

Tsuna swallowed in terror. “Uh yeah, Hibari-san and I have been together for forever.”

Gokudera sputtered but couldn’t do anything without dropping Lambo.

“But you still call him by his last name?” the blond asked skeptically. “Prove it.”

“Uh…”

“You know. Do some of what those guys over there are doing.” He pointed to the bar where people were continuing to be shirtless and grope each other.

Tsuna flushed. “I can’t do that!”

“Then you’re not a couple.”

“Just because we don’t do PDA doesn’t mean we’re not a couple! Right, Hibari-san?”

“Let’s just do it.”

“What?!”

Just as Hibari was about to put his hand down Tsuna’s pants, a brunette interrupted.

“Kufufu, that’s really not necessary Skylark-kun.”

“Mukuro?” Tsuna asked. “Why are you a woman?”

The blond sighed. “This is getting annoying. Are we going to have sex in the bathroom or not?” he asked Hibari.

“I am not going to answer that.”

Tsuna shrieked. “No one should be having sex in a bathroom! That’s dirty!”

“Uh, yeah. That’s the point.” The blond replied. “Are you always such a prude? I mean, seriously. Wouldn’t your time be better spent screaming someone’s name instead of making all of these complaints?”

Luckily for Tsuna, Ryohei found them at this time and interjected with an, “Extreme dance party!”

Tsuna sighed. “Onii-san this isn’t a dance party. And where’s your shirt?”

“I’m not wearing a shirt?”

“Haha,” Yamamoto interrupted. “Senpai had a little too much to drink.”

Suddenly there was a large explosion.

“Gokudera-kun!” Tsuna yelled.

“It wasn’t me Tenth!” he replied.

“Kikikikiki” a high pitched twisted laughter echoed through the club silencing the screaming of the general populous.

The smoke cleared to reveal Chrome.

“Nagi?” Mukuro asked. “What are you doing?”

“They wouldn’t let me in!” she yelled. “Kikikikiki. I’m sure they regret it now.”

“Oh yeah,” Tsuna replied. “I forgot about that.”

“How dare that bouncer say that I didn’t have the right attitude to go clubbing!”

Ryohei sloshed his drink on the floor. “Where did you extremely get the explosives?”

Chrome grinned. “I remembered that Gokudera-san kept C4 in the trunk of all of cars that carry Boss, just in case.”

“Whoa! How extreme, Octopus-head!”

“WHAT?!?” Tsuna shrieked. “Gokudera-kun! That’s a really stupid idea!”

“Oooh I love this song!” Lambo interrupted. “Your love it feels so good and that’s what makes me high~” he sang.

At this point the police showed up and Tsuna swore that he was never going anywhere ever again.


End file.
